From Plato and Platypus Walk into a Bar...

Here’s another example of a philogag, this one a riff on the Argument from Analogy, which says that if two outcomes are similar, they must have a similar cause: A ninety-year-old man went to the doctor and said, “Doctor, my eighteen-year-old wife is expecting a baby.” The doctor said, “Let me tell you a story. A man went hunting, but instead of a gun, he picked up an umbrella by mistake. When a bear suddenly charged at the man, he picked up the umbrella, shot the bear, and killed it.” The man said, “Impossible. Someone else must have shot that bear.” The doctor said, “My point exactly!"

You couldn’t ask for a better illustration of the Argument from Analogy, a philosophical ploy currently (and erroneously) being used in the argument for Intelligent Design (i.e., if there ’s an eyeball, there must be an Eyeball-Designer-in-the-Sky.)

Pulking Flowers and Cigrette Buts

One of the things I enjoy while in Vizag is, walking a couple of miles to Kailasa Giri early AM, hiking up 840 steps, roaming around Shiva-Parvathi statues on the hill, and walking back home. 

This sign post atop Kailasa Giri (shot in March'09) cracks me up.

Achilles' Heels

Giving 103%

This is PG-13. If you are a kid, just skip this blog post - trust me, you are not missing anything.

For the rest, here is an interesting argument forward to me by my buddy Kiran.

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life? 

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions. If: A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26

It is obvious that: H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K = 8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%,

K-N-O-W-L-E-D-G-E = 11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%, 

and A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E = 1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%.

However, B-U-L-L-S-H-I-T = 2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103% and

A-S-S-K-I-S-S-I-N-G = 1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 127%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while Hard Work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and ass-kissing that will put you over the top !

To Mock a Killing Bird

I like native American dances with eagle costumes. Here is an interesting video of Hopi and Pueblo Indians performing eagle dance.

I also find Hopi's prophecies interesting (but not believable!).

The end of all Hopi ceremonialism will come when a "Kachina" removes his mask during a dance in the plaza before uninitiated children [the general public]. For a while there will be no more ceremonies, no more faith. Then Oraibi will be rejuvenated with its faith and ceremonies, marking the start of a new cycle of Hopi life.

World War III will be started by those peoples who first revealed the light (the divine wisdom or intelligence) in the other old countries (India, China, Islamic Nations, Africa.)

The United States will be destroyed, land and people, by atomic bombs and radioactivity. Only the Hopis and their homeland will be preserved as an oasis to which refugees will flee. Bomb shelters are a fallacy. "It is only materialistic people who seek to make shelters. Those who are at peace in their hearts already are in the great shelter of life. There is no shelter for evil. Those who take no part in the making of world division by ideology are ready to resume life in another world, be they Black, White, Red, or Yellow race. They are all one, brothers."

The war will be "a spiritual conflict with material matters. Material matters will be destroyed by spiritual beings who will remain to create one world and one nation under one power, that of the Creator."

Digital Communication Barriers

Devendra Harne of India has entered into the Guinness Book of World Records because he has 12 fingers and 13 toes. Looks like he is being able to lead a normal life and took it with light heart - good for him.

If he were in the US, I can see a couple of disadvantages for Devendra.  First, he has even number of fingers on each hand - if someone really ticks him off, it would be hard for him to effectively communicate his genuine feelings :-)

Second,  it would be hard for him to remember if the month of August has 30 days or 31 days!

On a serious note, it is inspiring to read about some seriously handicapped people who managed to completely ignore their disabilities and reach amazing heights, while we were complaining about all the things that we didn't have.

Mexicans and Racism

Read in yesterday's newspaper that McCombs grads are not getting as many jobs offers as they used to. To get handyman jobs done cheap, so far, some folks have been shopping for (hard working) illegal immigrant labor near Home Depots and Lowe's. Things are changing a little bit these days. 

This is a racist video that I came across a couple of years ago; not a must watch video.

Funky Kinky

I love this Austinite's rebellious nature and sense of humor. I had a glimpse of him at a book festival a couple of years ago. At that time, his stall was the busiest, a lot busier than Dr. Stiglitz's. Here are some excerpts/quotes from an article on Kinky in Reader's Digest.

No, he's not the governor of Texas. He just likes the way it sounds. What he is: a singer, author, businessman, troublemaker—everything but governor. But it's not for lack of trying.

The self-described compassionate redneck, who coined the phrase "Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder" and penned the country-western ballad "Get Your Biscuits in the Oven and Your Buns in the Bed" for his band, the Texas Jewboys, was clearly not in his element. Thus far, his campaign had taken him to Texas roadhouses, where his unique brand of antigovernment grousing had ignited audiences. He had proven to be a man of the people—but mostly inebriated people.

They cracked up when he declared, "As the first Jewish governor, I'll reduce the speed limit to 54.95!" They even laughed with approval at his liberal views on gay marriage: "They have the right to be just as miserable as the rest of us." He slayed them with his campaign slogan, "I can't screw it up any worse than it already is!"

Beneath the humor beat the heart of a rebel. He insisted on opposing capital punishment, not exactly a popular position in Texas. "You can't leave decisions about someone's life to people who can't run the post office," he explained.

Of course, it all went for naught—he ended up with only 12 percent of the vote. "God himself wouldn't win as an independent in Texas," he says.

After graduating from the University of Texas at Austin, where he acquired his nickname (for his hair), it was off to the Peace Corps. "I served in Borneo, teaching agricultural techniques to people who have successfully farmed for thousands of years," he recalls.

Back in Texas, he and the Texas Jewboys attracted a following with songs like "They Ain't Makin' Jews Like Jesus Anymore," a humorous screed against bigotry, and toured with the likes of Bob Dylan and Willie Nelson.

"You don't accomplish much by swimming with the mainstream," Friedman says. "Hell, a dead fish can do that."

Rat Race

The following is an old one, with some wisdom packed into it. Laziness will certainly bring gloom in the future. But the thing most of us fail to understand is, over work can also wreak havoc on our system.

One day a fisherman was lying on a beautiful beach, with his fishing pole propped up in the sand and his solitary line cast out into the sparkling blue surf. He was enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun and the prospect of catching a fish.

About that time, a businessman came walking down the beach, trying to relieve some of the stress of his workday. He noticed the fisherman sitting on the beach and decided to find out why this fisherman was fishing instead of working harder to make a living for himself and his family.

"You aren't going to catch many fish that way," said the businessman to the fisherman, "you should be working rather than lying on the beach!"

The fisherman looked up at the businessman, smiled and replied, "And what will my reward be?"

"Well, you can get bigger nets and catch more fish!" was the businessman's answer.

"And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman, still smiling.

The businessman replied, "You will make money and you'll be able to buy a boat, which will then result in larger catches of fish!"

"And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman again.

The businessman was beginning to get a little irritated with the fisherman's questions. "You can buy a bigger boat, and hire some people to work for you!" he said.

"And then what will my reward be?" repeated the fisherman.

The businessman was getting angry. "Don't you understand? You can build up a fleet of fishing boats, sail all over the world, and let all your employees catch fish for you!" "Then, you don't have to worry about anything and just relax."

The fisherman, still smiling, looked up and said, "And what do you think I'm doing right now?"

Ineptitude!

Funny (and true!)

Meditation

Ajahn Chah on meditation.

Remember that we cannot avoid problems, but we can change our reaction to them. Be kind to yourself!

"So don't be in a hurry and try to push or rush your practice.
Do your meditation gently and gradually step by step.
In regard to peacefulness, if you become peaceful, then accept it;
if you don't become peaceful, then accept that also.
That's the nature of the mind.
We must find our our own practice and persistently keep at it."

Two men are talking on the street.
'And how's your son? Is he still unemployed?'
'Yes, he is. But he is meditating now.'
'Meditating? What's that?'
'I don't know, but it's better than sitting around doing nothing!'

Famous Last Words

I Think I Can Make It!

There Ain't No Gas Line Here

It'll Support My Weight

I've Done This a Million Times

Do you smell gas?

I Know It's Lightning Outside

The Train Never Comes Down This Track Any More

Sure, This Water Is Deep Enough For Dive

The Power's Off

This Fuse Is Plenty Long

I told you I was sick!

I knew this was going to happen to me!

I'm Just Gonna Take Me a Wizz Over Here By the Electric Fence

Hey y'all…watch this!

Ethics is not for Wimps

I noticed the following content on a nice poster in the dining hall of our office. It is hard to disagree with this.

Let's be honest. Ethics is not for wimps. It's not easy being a good person.

It's not easy to be honest when it might be costly; to play fair when others cheat or to keep inconvenient promises.

It's not easy to stand up for our beliefs and still respect differing viewpoints.

It's not easy to control powerful impulses, to be accountable for our attitudes and actions, to tackle unpleasant tasks or to sacrifice the now for later.

It's not easy to bear criticism and learn from it without getting angry, to take advice or to admit error.

It's not easy to really feel genuine remorse and apologize sincerely or to accept an apology graciously and truly forgive.

It's not easy to stop feeling like a victim, to resist cynicism and to make the best of every situation.

It's not easy to be consistently kind, to think of others first, to judge generously, to give the benefit of the doubt.

It's not easy to be grateful or to give without concern for reward or gratitude.

It's not easy to fail and still keep trying; to learn from failure, to risk failing again, to start over, to lose with grace or to be glad for the success of another.

It's not easy to avoid excuses and rationalizations or resist temptations.

No, being a person of character is not easy. That's why it's such a lofty goal and an admirable achievement.

Fowl Language

Reminded me of a quip I overheard in a grocery store check-out line:

Fowl is a four-letter "F" bird

Brigands Mistook Bread for Bread!

How often will this happen? - someone mistaking one thing for another synonymous thing!

Two Australian robbers thought they were hauling away a big sack of cash from the Cuckoo Restaurant, but it turned out to be bread rolls — and one of them accidentally shot the other in the buttocks during the heist.

Benjamin Jorgensen, 38, and his accomplice Donna Hayes, 36, were sentenced Tuesday after pleading guilty to robbing the restaurant in the southern Australian city of Melbourne on April 1 last year.

During the April Fools Day holdup, Jorgensen grabbed what he believed was a bag with the Cuckoo's daily take of about U.S. $26,000 in cash, but later found it was full of bread rolls, the Victorian County Court heard.

Five-Second Rule

According to the proven Five-Second Rule, we can eat cookies, candy etc. dropped on non-carpeted floors, if we manage to pick them up within five seconds of dropping!

This (kind of gross) 53-second video made a persuasive comment on this rule:-) I say, a video is worth a thousand pictures!

Don't Judge Too Quickly!

MADtv - iRack (including blooper in the end)

My buddy Raama forwarded me this hilarious Video.