George Bush is Funny

And Frank Caliendo is hilarious!



I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully - George W. Bush

Funky Kinky

I love this Austinite's rebellious nature and sense of humor. I had a glimpse of him at a book festival a couple of years ago. At that time, his stall was the busiest, a lot busier than Dr. Stiglitz's. Here are some excerpts/quotes from an article on Kinky in Reader's Digest.

No, he's not the governor of Texas. He just likes the way it sounds. What he is: a singer, author, businessman, troublemaker—everything but governor. But it's not for lack of trying.

The self-described compassionate redneck, who coined the phrase "Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder" and penned the country-western ballad "Get Your Biscuits in the Oven and Your Buns in the Bed" for his band, the Texas Jewboys, was clearly not in his element. Thus far, his campaign had taken him to Texas roadhouses, where his unique brand of antigovernment grousing had ignited audiences. He had proven to be a man of the people—but mostly inebriated people.

They cracked up when he declared, "As the first Jewish governor, I'll reduce the speed limit to 54.95!" They even laughed with approval at his liberal views on gay marriage: "They have the right to be just as miserable as the rest of us." He slayed them with his campaign slogan, "I can't screw it up any worse than it already is!"

Beneath the humor beat the heart of a rebel. He insisted on opposing capital punishment, not exactly a popular position in Texas. "You can't leave decisions about someone's life to people who can't run the post office," he explained.

Of course, it all went for naught—he ended up with only 12 percent of the vote. "God himself wouldn't win as an independent in Texas," he says.

After graduating from the University of Texas at Austin, where he acquired his nickname (for his hair), it was off to the Peace Corps. "I served in Borneo, teaching agricultural techniques to people who have successfully farmed for thousands of years," he recalls.

Back in Texas, he and the Texas Jewboys attracted a following with songs like "They Ain't Makin' Jews Like Jesus Anymore," a humorous screed against bigotry, and toured with the likes of Bob Dylan and Willie Nelson.

"You don't accomplish much by swimming with the mainstream," Friedman says. "Hell, a dead fish can do that."

Rat Race

The following is an old one, with some wisdom packed into it. Laziness will certainly bring gloom in the future. But the thing most of us fail to understand is, over work can also wreak havoc on our system.

One day a fisherman was lying on a beautiful beach, with his fishing pole propped up in the sand and his solitary line cast out into the sparkling blue surf. He was enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun and the prospect of catching a fish.

About that time, a businessman came walking down the beach, trying to relieve some of the stress of his workday. He noticed the fisherman sitting on the beach and decided to find out why this fisherman was fishing instead of working harder to make a living for himself and his family.

"You aren't going to catch many fish that way," said the businessman to the fisherman, "you should be working rather than lying on the beach!"

The fisherman looked up at the businessman, smiled and replied, "And what will my reward be?"

"Well, you can get bigger nets and catch more fish!" was the businessman's answer.

"And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman, still smiling.

The businessman replied, "You will make money and you'll be able to buy a boat, which will then result in larger catches of fish!"

"And then what will my reward be?" asked the fisherman again.

The businessman was beginning to get a little irritated with the fisherman's questions. "You can buy a bigger boat, and hire some people to work for you!" he said.

"And then what will my reward be?" repeated the fisherman.

The businessman was getting angry. "Don't you understand? You can build up a fleet of fishing boats, sail all over the world, and let all your employees catch fish for you!" "Then, you don't have to worry about anything and just relax."

The fisherman, still smiling, looked up and said, "And what do you think I'm doing right now?"

Disorganized Fun!

I think the music is bound to be good, when the artist absolutely enjoys his creation, and totally lives in the moment. I loved this music and tempo.

Barsana Sham?

Barsana Dham is the most beautiful among the temples I visited so far. It is located in a 200-acre complex, with trees, gardens, and a peach farm. Also, drive to this temple is very scenic; winding rural roads through small rolling hills. Though we don't frequent this temple, I enjoyed Sunday spiritual discourses (presented by folks other than the Swamiji!) the few times I visited.

I was surprised to watch on TV today that the founder was arrested for his indecency with children in the past. This is not the first allegation I heard on Barsana Dham. In the recent past, Kripalu Maharaj was charged with rape in Trinidad, and then I came across My Life in Cult. In spite of all the nice people at this temple, I am not too sure of what to think of it any more.

I guess we don't want to be outdone by Catholic Priests.

F'n Reading!

Missing Tim Russert

My Sunday morning's rituals include talking to Vizag around 7 AM, watching Joel Olsteen's sermon at 8 AM, and watching Meet the Press at 10 AM, religiously. I am deeply saddened by Tim Russert's absence on Meet the Press, and am not that enthusiastic about this show any more.

Here is one of my fond memories of Tim Russert, from the recent past. For a while, I watched 2008 Democrat primaries closely. I was particularly impressed by Tim Russert's analysis of the situation (and his articulation) shortly after North Carolina and Indiana primaries, and his prediction with certainty. At that time, I was flipping channels between NBC and CNN for news analysis, while the election results were pouring in.

On one side, it was John King on CNN (nothing against him, he was trying) with his fancy wall-sized flat screen with iPhone kind of finger-operated scroll, zoom, and pan features. He was throwing all kinds of numbers, statistics, and what-if scenarios at the audience. It was not clear what to make of all that information. At that time, Tim Russert showed up on NBC with his signature white board, and emphatically said that it was over for Clinton*! What a class! Of course, Who can forget Florida, Florida, Florida in 2000!?



We can gain knowledge with effort. But to acquire wisdom, we need passion as an ingredient. Tim's wisdom in political analysis reminded me of an article on Enrico Fermi that I read in Reader's Digest a long time ago.

At twenty-nine minutes past five, on a Monday morning in July of 1945, the world's first atom bomb exploded in the desert sixty miles northwest of Alamogordo, New Mexico. Forty seconds later, the blast's shock wave reached the base camp, where scientists stood in stunned contemplation of the historic spectacle. The first person to stir was the Italian-American physicist Enrico Fermi, who was on hand to witness the culmination of a project he had helped begin.

Before the bomb detonated, Fermi had torn a sheet of notebook paper into small bits. Then, as he felt the first quiver of the shock wave spreading outward through the still air, he released the shreds above his head. They fluttered down and away from the mushroom cloud growing on the horizon, landing about two and a half yards behind him. After a brief mental calculation, Fermi announced that the bomb's energy had been equivalent to that produced by ten thousand tons of TNT. Sophisticated instruments also were at the site, and analyses of their readings of the shock wave's velocity and pressure, an exercise that took several weeks to complete, confirmed Fermi's instant estimate.

As I read somewhere, "the one who knows How? will get the job. The one who knows Why? will be his boss!"

* probably with pleasure, as (in my opinion), his bias against Hillary Clinton (like mine!) was obvious from his earlier shows.